When you move away to college,
coming back home rarely crosses your mind. After all, there’s so much
excitement around finding your own apartment and living independently that your
mind shifts to the future. Then summer rolls around, your rent is up, and with
a couple of months to yourself with no on-campus classes, it makes sense to
head back home and check in with the family.
Of course, since you have moved
out and had a taste of freedom, you can expect the dynamics with your parents
to have changed in this time. It’s important to recognize this beforehand, as
it can make all the difference in maintaining a positive relationship going
forward.
Here are some tips for moving
back home during Summer:
Talk About Expectations
Before you even make the move,
it’s important to set some ground rules. Your parents have missed you, and are
excited to have you back home, but they might not have considered how things
have changed for you since moving out. From their perspective, they are just
expecting you to move back in with the same rules that were in place before you
left.
Have the conversation beforehand
and let your parents know of any rules you are hoping might shift upon your
return and why. Give them an indication of how long you are planning to move
back in for, and why you are moving back. Addressing all these factors is a
healthy way to restart the relationship and enforces clarity on exactly what
both parties expect.
Set Boundaries
You’ve experienced the freedom of
having your own room, staying up as late as you want, and enjoying privacy
whenever you need it. Talk to your parents about your need for privacy back in
the home, too. Of course, it’s important to remember this is a two-way street
and they may have demands of their own. Let them set rules about who is allowed
into your room. Once these rules are established, you can ask for privacy and
earn their trust by following their rules as well.
Be Prepared To Help
You’re an adult now, and if you
are going to move back and ask to be treated like one, then it’s only fair that
you also help out around the home. You could discuss an amount for rent each
month, or chores you can do to help out instead. Just because you are home
doesn’t mean you should expect your parents to do chores for you. Instead, be
proactive and show your parents just how independent you now are.
Respect Each Other
A satisfying home life comes down
to respecting the rules and also respecting your parents. Sure, things have
changed since you first moved out, but that doesn’t mean they can’t still work
– just differently. Fighting, yelling, name calling and disobeying the rules
will only lead to a tumultuous relationship. Remember, they are your parents
for life, and if you want them to start seeing you as an adult, it’s important
to act like one.
Even if your summer break doesn’t
go as planned, you can take advantage of your return to school with apartments
for rent. Peterborough, Ontario students
are fortunate to have Severn Court Residence as an excellent option for
off-campus housing, with fully furnished units perfect for Fleming College
students.
